"Pride Month begins on June 1 and lasts until either homophobia is destroyed or the first day of July—whichever comes first. Here are some great ways to celebrate:
1) Repent - The best thing you can do during Pride Month, or any month.
2) Read all the verses in your Bible that mention pride - Then, repent again.
3) Participate in the ceremonial exchanging of the Ukraine flag profile pic for the rainbow flag profile pic - It is a time-honored tradition.
4) Buy a Mustang - Become an honorary gay.
5) Put some frogs in water treated with government chemicals - This will make them gay.
6) Use the urinal right next to another dude - Don't make it weird; just do it.
7) Reclaim the rainbow as a symbol of God's promise to never flood the earth again - Then be really annoying by complimenting all the gay people for embracing the Noahic covenant.
8) Listen to some gay artists like George Michael, Elton John, or Maroon 5 - This will show you are an ally.
9) Go to your local library and host a "Sodom and Gomorrah Genesis 19 Reading Hour" for the little ones - We must honor our LGBTQ history.
10) Repent one more time just to be sure - You can't be too careful when you're living in a nation that blatantly defied God for decades after He blessed her and made her into the most prosperous nation on earth!
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