A Dave Barry Two-fer: Where to Christmas Shop and What to Shop For

Dave Barry on where to shop; Christmas Shopping; a Survivor's Guide  "These days, people say "Season's Greetings," which, when you think about it, means nothing. It's like walking up to somebody and saying "Appropriate Remark" in a loud, cheerful voice. But "Season's Greetings" is safer, because it does not refer to any actual religion. Some day, I imagine, even "Season's Greetings" will be considered too religious, and we'll celebrate the Holiday Season by saying "Have a nice day." "

And when you get into the mall, this will tell you what to buy. Or maybe not: Dave Barry’s Gift Guide   "But my point is, if you’re just getting started now on your holiday shopping, you have already missed the mall bargains. That’s the bad news. The good news is, you’re still in time for our annual Holiday Gift Guide, which features a collection of unique gift items that you are not going to find at the mall, because not even holiday mall shoppers are desperate enough to buy these items."

Let's begin, shall we?

‘ON THE GO’ CHARACTER INFLATABLE POTTY SEAT  "...you can simply inflate this potty seat, using your mouth, then put it on the toilet seat for your child to sit on. Then you simply deflate the potty seat and burn it, because you’re not going to want to keep it around, let alone reinflate it."

‘THE WOOFER’ WEARABLE SOUND SYSTEM FOR DOGS  "If there’s one thing that everybody agrees on, it’s that dogs do not make enough noise."...
NFL PRO TOASTER "But if you want to be a REAL fan, you need to show your support in the most meaningful way of all: with toast."
MEGA PLUMBER ACTION HERO "...we’re sure he’ll provide hours of quality entertainment for any child who enjoys fantasizing — and what child does not? — about unclogging drains."
POTATO-CHIP-GRABBING HAND "Is there anything worse than getting your hands greasy from using them to manually pick up potato chips?"....
ARTIFICIAL GRASS FLIP-FLOPS  "These are the official flip-flops of the United States Supreme Court."

TRAILER-HITCH-MOUNTED STRIPPER POLE "The big problem with conventional stripper poles is that they are attached to strip clubs, which are large heavy buildings and therefore difficult to transport."

 

SQUIRREL AND CHICKEN MASKS  "So you appear to be an attentive, interested, meeting-attending squirrel or chicken, no matter what you are actually doing with your face in there."

TOILET TATTOOS  "If you’re like most people, it has been a long time since you remarked: “That is certainly a visually interesting toilet seat!”"

INFLATABLE UNICORN HORNS FOR CATS  "Do you have cat lovers on your holiday list? If so, here’s a gift that is sure to make them say: “What?” "

EMERGENCY UNDERPANTS DISPENSER "This year, give the precious gift of peace of mind. Give emergency underpants"

We wish you a blessed Christmas, full of all the meaning it was meant to have

What is "Peace on earth, good will toward men"?  "On earth peace - That is, the gospel will bring peace. The Saviour was predicted as the Prince of peace, Isaiah 9:6. The world is at war with God; sinners are at enmity against their Maker and against each other. There is no peace to the wicked. But Jesus came to make peace; and this he did,

1. By reconciling the world to God by His atonement.
2. By bringing the sinner to a state of peace with his Maker; inducing him to lay down the weapons of rebellion and to submit his soul to God, thus giving him the peace which passeth all understanding.
3. By diffusing in the heart universal good-will to people - "disposing," people to lay aside their differences, to love one another, to seek each other's welfare, and to banish envy, malice, pride, lust, passion, and covetousness - in all ages the most fruitful causes of difference among people. And....

Acclamations of the Birth of Christ (Luke 2:1-20)

Peace on Earth, Good Will Towards Men?  "It was to be His sacrificial death and resurrection from the dead that would restore fellowship between man with their Creator and establish an EVERLASTING peace between the two parties."

A very special wish goes out to those who have suffered devastating loss recently, such as families of soldiers killed in battle and  those who feel the loss of our children in the Newtown school murders.
From Probe Ministries; Is Christmas Necessary?
"There is a historical/theological necessity that cannot be altered. If God had not become flesh, there would be no hope for mankind. There would be no birth of Christ, no death on our behalf, and no resurrection from death to life. Praise God He did humble Himself and become as a man!"

The Newtown murderer is, to me, a modern-day Herod.

British hospital apologizes to familes for appallingly negligent care

The UK; our role model for government-run healthcare:
Rick Moran  "It apparently got so bad at this hospital that doctors began to prescribe water because the staff was forgetting to give patients enough to keep them hydrated.
"It's not lack of compassion but rather simple incompetence that is the problem at this hospital. It runs from top to bottom; an obvious lack of supervision all the way to ignorant, lazy nurses.
"Is this what we have to look forward to with Obamacare? Eventually, I'm afraid that there are going to be similar cases in this country after government health care really gets rolling."

DREAMING OF A GREEN CHRISTMAS

http://terrellaftermath.com/

The Pencil: a lesson in economics and market forces

Heritage  "How does a pencil represent what Adam Smith called “the invisible hand” of the free market? A new film by the Competitive Enterprise Institute has adapted Leonard Read’s famous essay, “I, Pencil: My Family Tree As Told to Leonard E. Read,” to answer this very question."

"I, Pencil: The Movie shows that “if we can leave these creative energies uninhibited, there is no limit to what we can accomplish.”
"To see I, Pencil: The Movie with extended commentary, click here. 

That anti-fracking movie, "Promised Land", Financed by Arab oil country

Matt Damon fracking film backed by big OPEC member  "Critics contend the UAE is trying to drum up opposition to more U.S. oil production, which could compete with its crude exports.

...."Either way, the revelation could be a setback for a film on an important U.S. energy topic, and will only give ammunition to critics who say the movie was biased from the get-go."
So just WHAT is fracking?

WSJ; Jenkins: Good Will Fracking Hollywood wimps out and makes a formula film.
"After a decade of war and half-century of costly military involvement in the Middle East, the United States stands on the brink of "energy independence." Then a shadowy Canadian billionaire coupled with Mideast oil interests sponsor a Hollywood propaganda movie aimed at luring Americans into throwing away the instrument of their deliverance: shale energy.
"They co-opt a name-brand Hollywood movie star to be the useful idiot of their nefarious plot. The movie is released a few days after Christmas, just in time for Oscar nominations in a diabolical scheme to influence a national debate over fracking.
"...typically stupid Hollywood plot, one that doubles down on the conventional "evil oil company" stereotype."
...."Which is very much like what ideological critics are saying about Mr. Damon's "Promised Land"—that the film's backers are an unholy alliance of green money and oil sheiks out to abort America's fracking windfall."     Emphasis added.

Useful Idiot Matt Damon’s Anti-Fracking Movie Financed by Oil-Rich Arab Nation
"A new film starring Matt Damon presents American oil and natural gas producers as money-grubbing villains purportedly poisoning rural American towns. It is therefore of particular note that it is financed in part by the royal family of the oil-rich United Arab Emirates."

http://www.jewishworldreview.com/strips/pc/prickly_city.php3

From Business Insider; Movie That Blasts Fracking Was Partly Funded By The Government Of Abu Dhabi  "The Abu Dhabi and the UAE economies have been driven by profits from their respective oil reserves for decades. Hydraulic fracking, a relatively new process, involves drilling about a mile below the surface of the earth in order to release natural gas from rocks within the "fractures" created by the drills (here is a more in-depth look to how it works). More gas derived from fracking means that the United States might need to purchase less oil from OPEC states like the UAE — which produces 2.7 million barrels of oil a day."

"Another source of controversy surrounding Image Nation's funding of "Promised Land" has been the fact that the chairman of the board of Abu Dhabi Media, His Excellency Mohamed Mubarak Al Mazrouei, is also the undersecretary to the Abu Dhabi Crown Prince's Court. His boss, his highness General Sheikh Mohammed bin Zayed Al Nahyan, serves on the Supreme Petroleum Council of the Abu Dhabi National oil company, which is "the highest authority responsible for the petroleum affairs in the Emirate of Abu Dhabi." "

From Newsbusters:  (Emphasis mine, TD)

"As an OPEC nation with huge oil reserves, it is in UAE's best interest to do whatever it can to reduce the oil supply of its competitors ESPECIALLY America which just so happens to also be the world's largest energy consumer.

"An end to hydraulic fracturing in the United States would help accomplish this.  "Beyond this, as fracking promises to produce significant amounts of natural gas for the U.S., this will act to decrease the demand for petroleum products domestically and worldwide.
"For UAE, this would be doubly bad news as it is also the world's seventh largest producer of natural gas.
"As such, attempting to kill fracking in America by financing Damon's propaganda seems just what the doctor ordered."

Do not take all this lightly because, as we saw in the 2012 election, a steady diet of one-sided propaganda does make a big difference in the American electorate, as we can see here:

timesunion.com