Gav The Gov waves farewell to his middle class

 

Two Babylon Bee parodies:

 Gavin Newsom Thankful As Fleeing Californians Can No Longer Afford To Fill Up Their U-Hauls

. . ."According to sources, it currently costs $7,827.00 to fill the gas tank of a U-Haul in California. With residents already struggling to survive, many are being forced to put their escape plans on hold. Still, others are undeterred, electing instead to form a migrant caravan to leave the oppressive state on foot. ". . .

Governor Newsom Enraged After Hearing Churches Singing Down In Whoville

. . ." Atop a cold peak near California's capital, Governor Gavin Newsom was enjoying the peace and quiet he'd earned by taking away everything fun in the state. But then, he heard something that made his blood run cold: singing!

"According to sources, every Christian in Cali, the tall and the small, was singing without any permits at all. The governor hadn't stopped the Lord's Day from coming! It came! Somehow or other, it came just the same!

" 'What's this? Singing? IN MY STATE?" Newsom cried as he looked down at the small village of Whoville and heard the believers gathered there singing songs, hymns, and spiritual songs. "I don't understand it! I don't! I took away all of their joy and their hope! I said not to sing, I said it, I did! I wasn't joking or pranking, I never kid!' ". . .