But just understand what you’re actually watching: a news program sponsored by a medical-industrial advertising engine that can’t stop telling you your “anus and genitals” might revolt unless you consult your physician immediately.
"I turn on Fox News for the same reason a man checks the weather before he goes outside: I want to know what’s coming, and I’d prefer not to be blindsided by it. Is the world on fire? Are we at war? Did Congress accidentally pass something useful? Did somebody somewhere do something so insane it requires a full segment and a therapist?
"But instead of news, analysis, or even just a respectable amount of yelling… I get hit with the commercial equivalent of a flashbang.
"In five minutes, I’m forced to watch four pharmaceutical ads.
"Four.
"That’s not a “commercial break.” That’s a managed care ambush.
"And nothing sets the tone for a nice peaceful breakfast like being told—over soft piano music and footage of smiling people walking through a field—that your new miracle medication may cause a rash “on your anus and genitals.”
"Nothing says “good morning, America” like hearing the phrase anus and genitals while you’re chewing eggs.
And this is where the game is up—because once you notice it, you can’t unsee it. Fox News isn’t just a news channel anymore. It’s a wildlife preserve where pharmaceutical companies roam freely, grazing in lush fields of captive audiences, dropping brand names like confetti, and buying so much airtime that the actual news becomes the side dish.
"Fox News is basically the perfect habitat for pharma advertising. The conditions are ideal. The economics line up so perfectly it’s almost beautiful in a “watching a vulture circle a wounded animal” kind of way.
"The audience skews older. Older audiences are more likely to have chronic conditions. Chronic conditions are where the money lives. And cable news viewers are still watching live—like God intended—so they can’t skip the ads with a swipe and a smug little grin. They have to sit there, take the hit, and wonder if they suddenly have psoriasis, blood clots, depression, or “moderate-to-severe something” that can only be treated with a drug that costs more than a used pickup." . . .More...
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