In a totally real report, The Babylon Bee tells us how the White House plans to stop Biden from tripping

  Twitchy  "Yesterday, we reported how the White House actually is working on a plan to prevent Joe Biden from tripping. And if you needed any proof that G-d exists and He has a sense of humor, then Biden proceeded to nearly fall down the stairs when getting off Air Force One.

"And now we have to take our hats off to The Babylon Bee because they have has unveiled exactly how they plan to keep Biden from tripping from now on. It's quite a scoop for them!" . . 

To Avoid Embarrassing Falls, Aides Will Now Transport Biden Using Presidential Hand Truck | Babylon Bee   WASHINGTON, D.C. — The White House announced a new directive Tuesday they say will put an end to President Joe Biden's endless pratfalls once and for all: transporting the leader of the free world on an official presidential hand truck

"Whoa, look at me go!" Biden said excitedly as he was pushed up the tarmac to Air Force One. "I'm flying!"

The presidential hand truck was specially designed by the nation's top scientists and is reportedly able to withstand the blast of a nuclear bomb.

"This baby is made out of the same heavy-duty material as the space shuttle," said Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre as she introduced the stylish presidential hand truck, code-named Limp. "It's completely bulletproof and capable of speeds in excess of 5 miles per hour."

According to sources, Biden is impressed by the hand truck's ability to whisk him away from journalists who keep asking him annoying questions about his undeniable corruption.

"Whoosh!" Biden cried out on one such occasion. "Frender limbergrander, man! Weeeeeeeee!"

At publishing time, the president had honored the hand truck with a Presidential Medal of Freedom.

"Indeed, here's Jeff Sessions using the lower end of the spectrum of force the law allows, though more subtly than we would have:" 

"It goes to show you how well known this behavior was, behind closed doors."