Judge Finds Luigi Mangione Too Stunningly Handsome And Gorgeous To Stand Trial (Parody)

Babylon Bee Parody

I believe those voices expressing lustful affection for this "bad guy" are the same 20-something Gen-Z female voices we can hear at pro-Hamas street rallies and daytime TV audiences. TD

"NEW YORK, NY — In a shocking development in the case of a killer charged with murdering a health insurance executive, a New York judge found that Luigi Mangione was too stunningly handsome and gorgeous to stand trial.

"Though the prosecution had reportedly built a strong case with substantial evidence against him, Mangione was deemed, upon examination, to be far too good-looking to be tried for the murder.

" 'Have you seen him?" said Judge Maureen Donaldson in her ruling. "My goodness. In all my years on the bench, I have never run across a case that is so startlingly violent and brutal and carried out by such a hunky piece of Italian beef. It is the opinion of this court that Mr. Magione be released from custody on the grounds of his hotness."

"Though the judge's ruling was met with immediate controversy, other legal experts agreed with the finding. "I absolutely concur with Judge Donaldson," said attorney and legal analyst Debra Garney. "In a case like this, it's important to take into account how devastatingly handsome the defendant is. In Mr. Mangione's case, the decision was an easy one. He's a smoke show, and smoke shows have no business standing trial for murder. It is paramount, however, that we be given access to Mr. Mangione following this ruling. I implore the judge to provide his phone number."

"At publishing time, court insiders said that the judge also had a hard time keeping the female jurors from swooning and fainting every time Mangione entered the courtroom."

The World Must Stop Ignoring What Iranians Already Know: The Regime Is on the Brink

No, this is not about Gavin Newsom and California. Any similarities are purely coincidental. The Tunnel Dweller

  RedState  

"This reality also exposes the hollowness of claims by Reza Pahlavi—the so-called “baby shah”—that he represents the Iranian people’s future. The Iranian public has firmly rejected both the monarchy and the theocracy."

He rules by power; but how does Newsom keep his job?

"Ernest Hemingway famously wrote when describing bankruptcy: It happens “gradually, then suddenly.” The same is true of dictatorships. They project an illusion of permanence—until the moment the façade shatters and decades of repression give way to rapid collapse. Nowhere is this dynamic more evident than in the Islamic Republic of Iran, a theocracy that has ruled for 46 years through corruption, brutality, and systemic mismanagement.

"In recent weeks, a severe water crisis has pushed Iran into international headlines. President Masoud Pezeshkian himself warned that it is very feasible that water rationing in Tehran may follow. Several of Tehran’s life-sustaining reservoirs are already below ten percent capacity.

"The regime claims this crisis is the result of uncontrollable natural forces. But experts overwhelmingly point to man-made causes: decades of mismanagement, dam-building and diversion projects controlled by the Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps (IRGC), and the regime’s chronic plundering of resources. Drought may be real, but the catastrophic scale of the disaster is the regime’s own creation.

"And the water crisis is only one among many. Fuel and electricity shortages have sparked protests. The economy is collapsing. Unemployment is soaring. Public services are failing. The environment is deteriorating at an alarming pace. A wildfire razed portions of the ancient Hyrcanian Forests, a UNESCO World Heritage site home to many endangered species, in November. Meanwhile, half the adult population lacks meaningful work, yet the regime pours billions into the IRGC, missile programs, regional militias, and vast surveillance networks designed to suppress domestic dissent." . . . 

"As international media continue to cover Iran’s water, economic, and political crises, they must also grapple with an unavoidable conclusion: if these trends continue, regime change in Iran is not only possible, but inevitable. Dictatorships fall the way Hemingway described—gradually, then suddenly. Iran is already deep into the “gradually” phase. The “suddenly” may come sooner than many expect."

Full article...

READ MORE: The End Is Near. Tehran Faces Evacuation As Water Supplies Reach Zero and the City Sinks Into the Desert. 

GOP Video Takes Up Crockett's Challenge: Finding a 'Clip of a Democrat Invoking Violence'

RedState 

"Crockett's self-own might be funny if it weren't so disgusting and damaging to our country."

 "The GOP took up a challenge from Democrat Rep. Jasmine Crockett (TX-30) for people to find proof that Democrats were "invoking violence," and it couldn't have backfired on her more spectacularly." . . .

"In response, numerous clips have resurfaced of the crazy things the Democrat representative has said. In one example, Crockett made comments during her appearance in October on The Breakfast Club radio show (which features host Charlamagne tha God), following Charlie Kirk's assassination a month earlier.

"Apparently, Crockett was so unaware of the massive numbers of Democrats who have incited violence against those on the right, that she apparently thought it would be hard to prove. But if you are a RedState reader, you know all too well that the proof is everywhere." . . .

 

Jasmine Crockett: “I challenge somebody to go and find a clip of a Democrat invoking violence.”
Here you go @JasmineForUS pic.twitter.com/zalak7LqJx

— GOP (@GOP) December 10, 2025

Jasmine Crockett’s Woman of the People Shtick Blows Up After Release of Latest FEC Filings – RedState

Civil War Witness Trees

Gettysburg Witness Trees Main Battlefield Witness Tree Map - Gettysburg Witness Trees

Gettysburg Witness Trees Home - Gettysburg Witness Trees

• 1. Robinson Grove
• 2. Herbst Woods
• 3. Shultz Woods
• 4. West Confederate Avenue
• 5. West Confederate Avenue (south)
• 6. South Confederate Avenue
• 7. Big Round Top
• 8. Saddle (Between the Round Tops)
• 9. Little Round Top
• 10. Sedgwick Avenue
• 11. Rose Woods
• 12. Sickles Witness Trees
• 13. Hancock Avenue
• 14. Culp’s Hill
• 15. In Town

Witness Trees | American Battlefield Trust

Witness trees, like the land we save, have seen things we cannot imagine, and bear the marks of our nation's history.  

"Witness trees are those flora of historic landscapes that remain in place decades or even centuries after noteworthy events unfolded there. Often the trees were young when the event took place, and have now grown to be massive, silent sentinels of history. These trees often evoke strong emotions when we see them, knowing they were present during some of our nation's most harrowing times. Nor is ours the first generation to attach significance to these trees; last year a tree was lost at George Washington's Mount Vernon that was known to have witnessed the General's life and had been carved with corps insignia by Union troops stationed on the property eager to leave their own mark on that piece of the past. So meaningful are these trees that great efforts may be taken to protect them. In 2006, the National Park Service created the Witness Tree Protection Program to safeguard 24 historically and biologically significant trees in the greater Washington, D.C., area, including the famous 1910 Japanese Flowering Cherry Trees and the Grant Memorial Bull Oak. In instances where a notable witness tree is lost to age, lightning strike or other cause – as in the case with the famous Charter Oak of Colonial Connecticut or Wye Oak of Maryland – its scions, intentionally gathered and planted, may take on near-mythic stature as well.

"Below are stories of some of the documented witness trees that still stand on America's battlefields. In many cases, they provide essential context and markers on battlefields, allowing us to better identify where parts of chaotic battles occurred. The trees, like the land we save, have seen things we cannot imagine, and bear the marks of those events." ... More...

Troy Carico: Islam's Trojan Horse is inside the gates

 1819 News  

"I’ve heard that “inshallah” phrase a thousand times in Afghanistan, always with the same dead eyes and half-smile, right before another green-on-blue ambush happened or right before another brother came home in a box." . . .

"I’ve seen the enemy up close … coffee-breath close, not sanitized through a remote monitor screen in some cushy Pentagon operations center. I saw him in the Hindu Kush, wearing the uniform I helped put on his back, carrying the rifle I taught him to shoot, eating the chow I shared with him – only to have him slip out at night to plant IEDs (improvised explosive device) for his Taliban brothers using the very gear for which Uncle Sam paid.

"That was Afghanistan, 2009-2010. I was embedded as an International Security Assistance Force advisor with the Afghan National Army (ANA). Daytime? They called us “mentor-sahib,” smiling just enough to keep the paychecks coming. Nighttime? Green-on-blue (insider) attacks, “friendly fire” happening.

"That’s not bad luck, that’s bad intentions! That’s taqiyya – a Shia doctrine that explicitly permits lying about one’s faith to advance Islam or protect oneself from danger – in action.

"Fast forward to last week in Washington, D.C. An Afghan “refugee,” one of the 80,000+ rushed into this country under Joe Biden’s catastrophic 2021 evacuation, ambushes two West Virginia Army National Guardsmen. Proper vetting? Of course not. The same administration that left $85 billion in weapons for the Taliban turned around and flew planeloads of unvetted military-age males straight into the heart of America.

"The Obama administration allowed refugee resettlements favoring Muslim countries, but Biden doubled down, throwing open the doors while our borders burned. Our tax dollars paid for the planes, the hotels, the EBT cards. We paid for the invasion, they just opened the gates.

"Now one of those “allies” has drawn American blood on American soil. The taqiyya never ends, it just changes zip codes.

"This was not a “lone wolf.” Lone wolves don’t have an entire global ideology whispering in their ear that deceiving the infidel is not just permitted, it’s pious. That same doctrine tells them jihad is eternal, that peace treaties with non-Muslims are mere truces until Islam is strong enough to strike.

"You must understand they are playing the long game … they are patient the way cancer is patient." . . . More...

Charlie Kirk’s Death 100% MSM and Democrats Fault

 RPT   

"Any Rep. or Senator who says Trump, his supporters, or other Republicans is Hitler or a Nazi doesn’t care about minimizing the horrors of the Holocaust. Any reporter who doesn’t challenge that disgusting statement is just as bad. (THE LID)"

 Clay Travis has a blunt response to Barack Obama’s claim that he “doesn’t know” what motivated Charlie Kirk’s murder. In just two minutes, Travis summed up what every angry American is feeling right now.

“YOU CAUSED THIS!”

“You can’t call the president of the United States Adolf Hitler for 10 years… you cannot say that anyone who voted for Trump or advocated for him like you, me, Riley, and Charlie Kirk are Nazis, and then when someone tries to kill us, suddenly say, ‘We condemn this violence.’ You caused it!”

“Look at me right now! You caused this! When you tell people that someone is Hitler, you are telling crazy people: go kill them. And I’m sick of pretending that is anything other than what they are doing. … Charlie Kirk bore the brunt of that left-wing violence.”

Also see,“How We Got Here“

"And yes, Lefties [similar to Islamo-Fascists], Thinks Lawns Are Racist. Add to that Math. Even showing up to work on time is “systematic white supremacy.” When everything is racist there’s no room for reason. And this is what we are seeing, when horticulture is considered racist, you have a whole generation that is ill prepared for real life:" . . .

Gov. DeSantis joins Gov. Abbott in taking a stand against radical Islam

 Conservative Review   

Political Islam is playing the long game — America isn’t even playing

Located in Richardson, TX, a short walk from our many churches

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis (R) announced a new executive order on Monday, taking action against radical Islam.

"DeSantis issued an order designating the Muslim Brotherhood and the Council on American-Islamic Relations as foreign terrorist organizations.

"The order, which took immediate effect, argued that the Muslim Brotherhood is a "transnational network with a long history of engaging in or supporting violence," noting that the group created Hamas in 1987. It stated that the U.S. designated Hamas as a foreign terrorist organization in 1997 and that the group was responsible for 1,200 murders on October 7, 2023.

"DeSantis' order explained that the Palestine Committee, a group affiliated with the Muslim Brotherhood, founded CAIR in the U.S. in 1994.

" 'CAIR was designated as an unindicted co-conspirator by the United States Government in the largest terrorism-financing case in American history, and the court found 'ample evidence to establish the association[]' of CAIR with terrorist organizations," the order read, citing United States v. Holy Land Foundation for Relief and Development." . . . More...  

Vermont school district raises Somali flag 

. . . "The unprecedented fraud even now being uncovered in Minnesota may explain why the state replaced its old flag a few years ago with one that bore a striking resemblance to the Somali flag. That a school in Vermont chose this time to raise the Somali flag is troubling at best." . . . Aren't we such nice people?

"Immigration is not a humanitarian gesture.  It is a national transaction and the transaction must strengthen the receiving nation."

Deranged Jasmine Crockett said Hispanics who voted for President Trump in 2024 have slave mentality.

 Choice Clips 

"Deranged Jasmine Crockett said Hispanics who voted for President Trump in 2024 have "slave mentality." Now, she says she will perform best with them in 2026."

rofcbybroc.com/

"Notice how her speech changes depending upon whom she is speaking to and the audience? “PERFORM” is the correct word to describe her."

Jasmine Crockett’s Farrakhan-Praising Pastor Launches Bid To Replace Crockett in Congress    . . . "Haynes is likely to have an advantage in the race thanks to his alliance with Crockett, who frequently attends Friendship-West and has called Haynes her mentor. It's a natural pairing, given that Haynes, like Crockett, has a tendency to make inflammatory remarks.

"Haynes, for example, posted a selfie with Farrakhan at a 2019 event and referred to the Nation of Islam leader, who once called Adolf Hitler a "great man," as a "wonderful and great man." His mentor, meanwhile, is Jeremiah Wright, the former pastor of Barack Obama who stoked outrage during the 2008 presidential race over a sermon in which he shouted, "God damn America."

Wouldn't that make him more of a Nazi or Fascist than Democrats claim President Trump and the Jews of Israel are?

Also from the above:

"Former congressman Colin Allred (D., Texas) attended Haynes’s church on multiple occasions as part of his own Senate campaigns. Allred, who quit his Senate race on Monday and launched a campaign for the House, held a voter registration event at Friendship-West in September, the Free Beacon reported."

Did Republicans Actually Trick Jasmine Crockett Into Running for Senate? 

 . . . "Now, the NRSC's Crockett gambit could be seen as risky, but it's likely to pay off in a place like Texas where progressive darlings don't always play well. But, progressive candidates are going to be all the rage in 2026 – and voters have shown in 2025 that they'll happily vote for the wackiest, most vile candidates out there (see: Jay Jones in Virginia) – so the right should proceed as is every unserious Democrat candidate is the next AOC in the making."

California’s new tax: A monthly subscription to use state roads

 Washington Examiner   

"California’s budget has since ballooned to $325 billion, and yet Democrats demand more money for the most basic function of government: building and maintaining roads."

"California’s latest scam tax to take money from its residents is essentially a subscription service that bills you every month for how often you drive a car.

"California Democrats, the personification of incompetence, have a two-pronged problem: The state wants to pay for road maintenance through an ever-increasing gas tax at the same time as it tries to force people to buy electric vehicles. Having finally realized the contradiction there, California is now planning to release the findings of a new pilot program, which charges drivers a tax per mile they drive. To spoil the conclusion of this saga for you, California will almost certainly recommend adopting this program statewide, because taxing Californians into the dirt is what the state does best.

"The program, as constructed, is essentially a subscription service that requires you to self-report your usage. Californians will have to report their mileage and be billed per mile every month. KMPH 26 broke down a possible hypothetical as follows: “If you live in Hanford and commute to and from Fresno 5 days a week with a Toyota Camry, you would have to pay just over $11 if the road tax is 3 cents.” That is $11 per week for your job if you commute about 40 minutes to work every day, not counting any other additional drives you may make. That would amount to about $44 per month. A Netflix subscription right now could cost you about $8 per month, for comparison.

"The result is a tax primarily on rural Californians, who must commute further to work, school, grocery stores, pharmacies, doctors’ offices, or relatives’ houses. These are the same rural communities being destroyed by California’s water regulations and EV mandates with insufficient EV infrastructure." . . .

TRUMP REVIVES CALIFORNIA'S WATER WARS BETWEEN FARMS AND FISH

Never forget that real genocide - NOT the trendy campus version - is what Hamas kills families for

Mike Harris Artwork

 New Israeli report says Hamas used sexual violence as a 'weapon of war' in Oct. 7 attack    

. . . "The report states that clear patterns emerged of sexual violence being perpetrated, including victims who were found “partially or fully naked with their hands tied, often to structures like trees or poles; evidence of gang rapes followed by execution; genital mutilation; and public humiliation.” The details add to and corroborate past reporting on sexual violence that took place during the attacks." . . .

Israel and activists accuse U.N. of slow response to accounts of Hamas militants raping women  

. . . “A survivor from the Nova rave party testified, ‘Everything was an apocalypse of corpses, girls without any clothes on, without tops, without underwear, people cut in half, butchered, some were beheaded,’” Yael Reichert, a chief superintendent with the Israeli national police, said at the U.N. meeting. Reichert is taking part in the Israeli government’s probe into sex crimes carried out in the Oct. 7 attack." . . .

Israel presents evidence, witness testimonies of Hamas's sexual violence in Oct. 7 attacks | CBC News   . . . "One unnamed witness of the Nova festival attack said she saw gunmen gang rape one woman and cut off the breast of another and throw it on the street.

"Later, police added, she saw a gunman shoot the woman in the head while raping her. 

"Reuters could not independently verify the accounts and police declined to name the witnesses or make her available to the news agency.

"Nachman Dyksztejn, a volunteer for Zaka Search and Rescue who was at the festival, wrote in testimony shared by Zaka with Reuters that he saw dozens of dead women in shelters. 

" 'Their clothing was torn on the upper part, but their bottoms were completely naked," it read.

"Concert producer Rami Shmuel, who helped in the searches for casualties at the Nova music festival in southern Israel not far from the Gaza border, said he saw the bodies of three women: one naked and the other two stripped from the waist down. One was clearly shot in the back of the head, he said, and torched."

Greta Thunberg's ignorance doesn't excuse her actions

. . . "As for the keffiyeh, did she even look at it before putting it on? Does she know that it’s the ceremonial garment of thousands and thousands of terrorists? It’s hard even to list them all: those who blew up the Sbarro’s pizzeria in Jerusalem in 2001, killing 16 people, including Americans; those who attacked public buses, hotels and even a disco that same year, leaving behind hundreds and hundreds of corpses, including the elderly and young children; those who murdered Israeli athletes and coaches at the Munich Olympics in 1972; and on and on until Oct. 7, 2023, and in all the days since. Terrorists wearing keffiyehs have been responsible for the killing and maiming of thousands and thousands of real, verifiable victims, including the more than 1,200 killed on Oct. 7, unlike the fake casualty figures reported by a Hamas ministry or Al Jazeera." . . .     

Children massacred by Hamas Are these the children of Nazis, Greta?

Well, This Is Awkward: Two Muslim Nations Will Be Facing Off at World Cup 'Pride Match'

Teri Christoph

"I had a saying that I used to tell my kids when they were younger and had been given a random treat or prize: "You get what you get, and you don't complain." Well, it's unlikely that the nations of Iran and Egypt will think of this as a treat or prize, but, thanks to a random draw, they have been chosen to face off in a "Pride Match" at next year's World Cup, the every-four-years global sports spectacle that the United States is hosting. Whether or not the two nations complain is yet to be seen. 

I had a saying that I used to tell my kids when they were younger and had been given a random treat or prize: "You get what you get, and you don't complain." Well, it's unlikely that the nations of Iran and Egypt will think of this as a treat or prize, but, thanks to a random draw, they have been chosen to face off in a "Pride Match" at next year's World Cup, the every-four-years global sports spectacle that the United States is hosting. Whether or not the two nations complain is yet to be seen. 

. . . "With World Cup matches set to take place in venues across the country, Seattle decided to take advantage of the situation and teamed up with area activists to give the matches in their city a decidedly rainbow-colored theme. From the FIFA Seattle website: 

"A spokesperson the Seattle Pride Match Advisory Committee (PMAC) told one media outlet, "The Pride Match has been scheduled to celebrate and elevate Pride events in Seattle and across the country, and it was planned well in advance. It is a Host City–led expression of Seattle and Washington State’s commitment to creating a welcoming and inclusive environment where everyone belongs: players, fans, residents, and visitors alike. Soccer has a unique power to unite people across borders, cultures and beliefs."

"The spokesperson added, “We are honored to host a Pride Match and to celebrate Pride as part of a global football community. This match reflects our ongoing commitment to respect, dignity, and unity for all.” . . . More...

Teri Christoph is the author of the Smart Girl Politics meme-letter. Follow her on Twitter or check out her carefully curated meme-posting over on Facebook.

Democrats finally shout FJB; Having lost the immigration war, they scapegoat their president

 Don Surber: Substack   

"Biden should take some blame. Sure, he’s just a Walter dummy sitting on Barack “Jeff Dunham” Obama’s lap, but even a dummy would know better than to do what Biden did."

........ 

   "On Thursday, September 2, 2021, students cheering on the Coastal Carolina Chanticleers in their football game against the Citadel Bulldogs began chanting, “F--k Joe Biden.”

"Coastal Carolina won 52–14.

"The Chanticleers chant posed a problem for Disney’s ESPN, which broadcast the game. I am pretty sure the sports channel’s managers hoped it would not spread. It did. The next night, Virginia Tech students picked up the chant in the Hokies game against UNC. Tech lost 17-10 but the chant spread nonetheless.

"Newsweek pointed out at the time:

Biden received criticism over the evacuation operation in Kabul, especially following the suicide attack at the airport which killed more than 180 people, including 13 U.S. service members.

A recent ABC News/Washington Post poll shows that Biden’s approval rating now stands at 44%—a decline of eight points from May—while his disapproval rate is now at 51%, up nine points from the same period.

The survey also found that while 77% of Americans supported the U.S. withdrawing from Afghanistan, 60% of people disapproved of the way Biden handled it.

"Surrendering Afghanistan and enough military gear to make the Taliban great again unmasked his incompetence.

"The FJB chant spread across like illegal alien truck drivers—the difference being the chant’s presence is lawful and the chant never killed anyone. The chant knocked down Biden’s popularity." . . .   Much more here...