Dave Barry’s 8 funniest lines from the New Hampshire primaries

Miami’s favorite funny man was in New Hampshire

Miami Herald  “On the Republican side, Ted Cruz won in Iowa. Donald Trump, who came in second, made an uncharacteristically low-key and gracious concession speech, but then the tranquilizer dart wore off and Trump fired off a series of semi-grammatical attack tweets claiming that Cruz is a liar and a fraud and by the way a Canadian who won Iowa by cheating. So he’s back in form.”

"Read the whole column: Tinkling on Iowa: It’s the New Hampshire primaries!"

. . . 

“ 'As for the debate itself: The high point, without question, was the introduction of the candidates, in which the process of getting seven guys to walk out onto a stage in a specific order somehow became more complicated than the Normandy invasion.”

"Read the whole column: Brain chips, porn, good food ... and, oh, yeah, the candidates"

Read more here: http://www.miamiherald.com/living/liv-columns-blogs/dave-barry/article59343083.html#storylink=cpy

Legal disarray after shock death of Justice Scalia: Abortion, immigration and gay rights decisions in doubt as Obama and Senate prepare to go head-to-head over successor

UK Daily Mail  "While the nomination battle for Justice Antonin Scalia's vacant seat has just begun, the repercussions of his death on the Supreme Court will be immediate.

"The absence of Scalia, who died from natural causes at a hunting ranch in Texas on Saturday, has left the Supreme Court split with four Democratic and Republican appointees each.

"Now a number of pending cases on abortion, immigration and affirmative action, among others, could be left with a 4-4 tie with the loss of conservative Scalia tipping the majority." . . . 

"He wasn't feeling well and went to bed early, CNN reported.

"When he did not show up for breakfast in the morning, a person associated with the ranch went to check on him and found his body in his room.

" 'The US Marshal Service, the Presidio County sheriff and the FBI are investigating Scalia's death but there was no evidence of foul play, a federal official told My San Antonio.

"'A gray Cadillac hearse, coming from Alpine Memorial Funeral Home, arrived at the ranch on Saturday afternoon. An El Paso priest was also called to Marfa on Saturday, KVIA reported.

" 'Scalia leaves behind his wife of 55 years, Maureen, as well as their nine children and 28 grandchildren. ' "

. . . 

"A 4-4 tie would also uphold the federal court's ban on Obama's 2014 executive action to protect four million undocumented immigrants from deportation.

"But it would not allow the Court to put broader limits on the authority of the president, a possibility they discussed in January, according to Bloomberg. 

""Unlike with the abortion and immigration cases, Scalia's absence will make a tie impossible in an upcoming affirmative action decision. " 

Read more:

• Scalia's Death Undercuts Conservative Hopes on Unions, Abortion - Bloomberg Politics

• Antonin Scalia’s death could lead to more 4-4 ties. Here’s what happens if it does. - Vox

• U.S. Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia found dead at West Texas ranch - San Antonio Express-News

• upreme Court Justice Scalia dies during hunting trip in Marfa | News - Home

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia Dies. America is no longer voting just for a President, we will be selecting a Supreme Court Justice

Do Republicans in Congress have the courage to deny Obama his choice for Justice? Expect a lot of liberal demagoguery this year and we must listen to what our Republican candidates say on this. Already Trump has indicated he will not fight for a Constitutional judge. The Tunnel Dweller.

Newsmax

. . . "President Barack Obama was informed of Scalia’s death Saturday afternoon, and his lame-duck status triggered immediate calls by Republicans to defer the nomination of a new justice until the next president’s term begins in 2017.

I'd say the left is rejoicing right now. TD

"Known for his sarcasm and combative style, Scalia was a polarizing force on the court and across the country. He called the 2015 decision that legalized gay marriage a “threat to American democracy,” said a 1992 abortion-rights opinion “cannot be taken seriously,” and predicted a 2008 ruling favoring Guantanamo Bay inmates “will almost certainly cause more Americans to be killed.”

Scathing Dissents:  "In 2002, Scalia blasted a decision that invoked the constitutional ban on cruel and unusual punishment to bar executions of mentally disabled killers. “Seldom has an opinion of this court rested so obviously upon nothing but the personal views of its members,” Scalia said in his dissent." . . .

Justice Scalia, Political Philosopher and Political Football  . . . "In a sense, Cruz and Rubio must speak for the very thing Scalia dedicated his life to: replacing the gut-level right-wing instincts of earlier brands of judicial conservatism with a philosophy in which ideas had consequences, means mattered as much as ends, and We The People was more than just the handy slogan of the demagogue." . . .

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, RIP.  . . . "Scalia’s death leaves a vacancy on the court. The court can operate with eight justices, but any decisions that result in a 4-4 split among the justices leave the lower court decision unchanged: 

Although rare, 4-4 ties are hardly unheard-of—justices do recuse themselves from time to time. A split decision effectively upholds the ruling of the lower court (presumably a state supreme court). In the event of such a tie, the court typically issues what’s known as a per curiam decision. The opinion in such a decision is issued under the court’s name, as opposed to consisting of a majority and a minority opinion. Justices, however, may attach dissenting opinions to the per curiam decision if they like—as happened in Bush v. Gore. When a 4-4 deadlock does occur, the case is not deemed to have set any sort of precedent. Tradition holds that the court’s per curiam opinion in such ties is usually very, very terse, often consisting of no more than a single sentence: “The judgment is affirmed by an equally divided court.' ” . . .

. . . "Ed Whelan, among others, argues that the Republican Senate should not confirm an Obama nominee."

WaPo: Antonin Scalia and the Fortas Precedent   "My Twitter feed is filled with Democrats loudly protesting that despite statements to the contrary by Senate Republican leaders, Senate Republicans wouldn’t dare to refuse to confirm a suitably qualified Supreme Court nominee in a presidential election year. I suspect they would dare, partly because the “base” would go nuts if they did otherwise, and partly because President Lyndon Johnson’s failed 1968 nomination of Abe Fortas to be Chief Justice provides a close enough analogy that it would be difficult to accuse the Senate GOP of acting in an unprecedented obstructionist manner." . . .

Next US president should nominate Scalia successor: Republican

Yahoo  via Drudge

"President Barack Obama should not nominate a successor to fill the critical vacancy in the US Supreme Court left by conservative Justice Antonin Scalia's death, the Senate Republican majority leader said Saturday. 

" 'The American people‎ should have a voice in the selection of their next Supreme Court Justice," Mitch McConnell said in a statement, referring to the upcoming November general election.

" 'Therefore, this vacancy should not be filled until we have a new president."

"McConnell mourned the loss of "an unwavering champion of a timeless document that unites each of us as Americans," referring to Scalia's fidelity to the US Constitution." . . .

Sanders: We Must End Over-Policing in African-American Neighborhoods

How'd that all work out in David Dinkins' New York? Anybody ride his subways back then?

CNS News  "Democratic presidential candidate Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) called for an end of “over-policing” in black neighborhoods during the PBS Democratic presidential debate in Milwaukee, Wis., on Thursday night.

“ 'What we have to do is end over-policing in African-American neighborhoods. The reality is that both the African-American community and the white community do marijuana at about equal rates,” Sanders said. “The reality is four times as many blacks get arrested for marijuana. Truth is that far more blacks get stopped for traffic violations.' ” . . .

“But, here is a pledge I've made throughout this campaign, and it's really not a very radical pledge. When we have more people in jail, disproportionately African American and Latino, than China does, a communist authoritarian society four times our size,” Sanders said. 

Maine Ends Dependence On Food Stamps: How Did It Happen?

Does Obama know about this? Shhhhh.

Investor's Business Daily  Via Lucianne

"Welfare Reform: The number of childless, able-bodied adult food stamp recipients in a New England state fell by 80% over the course of a few months. This didn’t require magic, just common sense.

"From December 2014 to March 2015, the caseload of able-bodied Maine adults with no dependents crashed from 13,332 recipients to 2,678, says the Heritage Foundation. This is a remarkable change and needs to be repeated in government programs across the country.

"How Maine achieved this is no mystery. Gov. Paul LePage simply established work requirements for food stamp recipients who have no dependents and are able enough to be employed. They must, write Heritage policy analysts Robert Rector and Rachel Sheffield, “take a job” — just 20 hours a week — “participate in training, or perform community service” for a mere 24 hours a week. Recipients who do none of those are stripped of their food stamp benefits after three months.

"This isn’t a radical new idea. Rector and Sheffield cite a successful historical precedent:" . . .More at the link.

The EPA — Caught Red-Handed Again

Investors Business Daily

Flint, Mich. resident Glaydes Williamson holds up water from Flint and hair pulled from her drain, during the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee hearing to examine the ongoing situation in Flint, Mich., on Capitol Hill in Washington, Wednesday, Feb. 3, 2016. (AP)

"Once again, the emails gave the Environmental Protection Agency away. An EPA official was caught red-handed with full knowledge of the danger of an environmental spill at Colorado’s Gold King Mine in emails discovered by the Denver Post, but the agency downplayed any knowledge of the hazard to the public. As 3 million gallons of lead, cadmium and other chemicals polluted the Animas River, the EPA pretty well tried to downplay the severity of that, too. The revelation, as John Hinderaker of Power Line points out, comes as news breaks of the EPA issuing a draconian, ruinous punishment for the owner of a company that didn’t have a storm plan.

"At the same time, the EPA was caught knowing all about the lead-contaminated drinking water in Flint, Michigan, according to emails, but planned to just let the public keep drinking, never mind the toxin.

"So much for the agency’s mission to protect the public from heartless environmental polluters. Apparently there’s honor among thieves, and if the villain is government, the racket will be protected. Public safety is no longer the top mission — protecting the bureaucracy is." . . .

Wait a minute! Hillary said it was the Republicans who did this.  Racist Republicans!

UPDATED: Former intel chief: Clinton should drop out, save FBI the manpower

UPDATE: Obama's Foreign Policy Rebuked – by His Own Intel Chiefs   "Barack Obama's foreign policy – and by extension Hillary Clinton's – received a stinging rebuke this week...from Obama's own intelligence chiefs.  Director of National Intelligence James Clapper and Lieutenant General Vincent Stewart, head of the Defense Intelligence Agency, gave Congress an assessment of threats around the globe that amounted to a direct indictment of Obama's failed foreign policies." . . .
Full article

Washington Examiner  A former top military intelligence official to President Obama said Hillary Clinton should step out of the 2016 presidential race due to the amount of resources and manpower required to conduct the private email investigation that could be put to better use.

"It's been stated that there are 100 FBI agents that are on this case. And yet we have the FBI director that has told us that all 50 states, we have Islamic State cases ongoing," said retired Lt. Gen. Michael Flynn, former director of the Defense Intelligence Agency, Friday to CNN's Jake Tapper.

From CNN

UPDATED: NJ Troopers ‘Remind’ Beyonce and NFL What the Black Panthers Have Done to Their Officers

UPDATE: TheBlaze anchor responds to death threats after criticizing Beyonce

"'Just like President Obama, Jada Pinkett Smith, Al Sharpton and so many others that just can't let America heal, [people like Beyonce] keep ripping off the historical bandaid. Why be a cultural leader when you can play the victim, right?" she said Tuesday evening.   "The Internet was not impressed, and many social media users responded by lashing out at Lahren with mockery and some reportedly threatened her with violence."

IJ Review

"Police groups around the country have taken serious issue with Beyonce’s Super Bowl halftime show, in which she invoked both the #BlackLivesMatter and Black Panthers movements.

"But a group of New Jersey State Troopers have a very historical reason for their “shock and disgust” over the performance.

One of their own fell at the hands of the Black Panthers—and they haven’t forgotten.

In 1979, Trooper Werner Foerster was shot and killed with his own service weapon after backing up a fellow officer.

Now, State Troopers Fraternal Association President Christopher Burgos has penned a letter to the NFL regarding the “blatant anti-police message,” and the apparent trampling of the memory of a slain officer:

Just as the NFL sometimes wears pink, perhaps they should be made to wear blue one month for a small penance. TD

The PBS debate disgrace devastatingly dismembered. Complete article

Thomas Lifson  "Can we please defund PBS, and let the American left pay for their own network without tax money from the rest of us?  The disgrace of PBS in moderating last night’s debate was even worse than I remarked on it.  Andrew Malcolm of Investor’s Business Daily* has penned a devastating debunking.  Read the whole thing, but here are a few highlights:

 Of the 16,000 words uttered by Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders and moderators Gwen Ifil and Judy Woodruff, not one of them concerned Clinton’s deepening email scandal. Not one mention of the words email, e-mail, private server or FBI.
Not a single media question or opponent mention of the huge legal cloud hanging over the party’s presumptive nominee. Nor of the ongoing FBI investigation into unauthorized use of her unsecured private email server for government business, including loose handling of Top Secret documents endangering national security intelligence-gathering and covert operations.
Not any reference to the State Department Inspector General’s subpoena to the Clinton Foundation exploring possible connections between foreign government donations possibly trying to curry favor during Clinton’s four-year tenure as Obama’s secretary of State.
Oh, and not a single word either about Benghazi, the murder of four Americans there, the phony video excuse, the lack of rescue or reinforcement attempts and any Clinton responsibility for the well-documented poor consulate security. Nothing on tax or entitlement reforms. National debt.
A complete pass for Hillary Clinton. Whoosh! Home free. Other than that, it was a serious grilling about being female, admiring Obama, taxing the rich more, free stuff and other liberal issues. 

 

*Emphasis added; TD

Weasel Of The Week!! – 02/11/16

Noisy Room   "Yes, it’s time to present this week’s Statuette of Shame, The Golden Weasel!!

"Every Tuesday, the Council nominates some of the slimiest, most despicable characters in public life for some deed of evil, cowardice or corruption they’ve performed. Then we vote to single out one particular Weasel for special mention, to whom we award the Statuette of Shame, our special, 100% plastic Golden Weasel. This week’s nominees were particularly slimy and despicable, but only one of them could win… and the votes are in and we have our winner… the envelope please…"

"The Ultra-sensitive Baby Killing Warriors At NARAL!!"

. . . "Nice Deb: I nominate NARAL for going on an unhinged Twitter rampage during the Super Bowl over the commercials.

During the big game yesterday, NARAL’s Twitter account “live-tweeted” reactions to the highly anticipated Super Bowl commercials, exposing themselves yet again to be the angry, humorless scolds we all know them to be. The pro-abortion outfit chastised advertisers over the most micro of “microaggressions” and their SJW followers on Twitter retweeted their complaints.

"In their most absurd Tweet, they attacked Doritos for showing an Ultrasound image image of a baby.

The Doritos ad in question showed a father eating Doritos while his pregnant wife received an ultrasound. The baby reacts strongly to the Doritos whenever Dad gets close with a chip. At the end, the baby physically launches itself out of the womb to try to get Doritos.

"NARAL denounced the Doritos ad for using the ” #antichoice tactic of humanizing fetuses & sexist tropes of dads as clueless, moms as uptight.' ”

Snowflake Students: “We’re Too Fragile To Be Educated!”

"Patheos   I’m out of here for the day — back to transcribing my book — but wanted to leave this here because it’s just horrific. Indoctrinating professors aside, can real teachers even dare to teach, anymore, with all of these little snowflakes melting around them and incapable of handling anything without being “triggered”? Do they know that life itself is one giant trigger after another, if you indulge yourself?

"I have a great fear that if this mindset is permitted to continue, we will find ourselves living amid political and social iconoclasts, who will demand the destruction of great works of art for the sin of being “triggering” or “aggressive” or God-forbid, heteronormative!

"Bernini’s Rape of Proserpina takes my breath away whenever I see it; it is myth so incredibly rendered into truth. When will someone take a hammer to it in the name of “sensitivity to rape victims who might have a triggering experience”, rather than allow it to stand as a representative for them, exposing rape’s horror?

"And after they’ve destroyed Proserpina, will they then take their hammers to the Pieta, because motherhood is an offensive stereotype and its promotion triggers feelings of all kinds of mother-related psychological trauma?

"And to quote a friend of mine: “Triggering is a real thing in mental illness and trauma, and their trivial use of it to describe their fear of the outside world is offensive.' ”

Campus Snowflakes & Enabling Masochists   "You would think that the collapse of the UVA rape hoax story would make college students and college administrators a little bit less anxious to go into full-blown hysterics against people who question the “campus rape culture” narrative. You would be wrong, at least in the case of Michigan State, where the university accommodated five special snowflakes who could not bear to hear George F. Willspeak at their graduation. What did George Will write back in June that aggrieved heretic-hunters? He questioned the statistics and the ideology behind the campus anti-rape movement: Excerpt:" . . .

Legal Insurrection: This Trigger Warning needs its own Trigger Warning
"Fragile minds need not apply."

"The fragile college student mind is getting more fragile by the day."As if the normal run of political correctness were not enough, we now have “Trigger Warnings” — the notion that students need to be warned that the material they are about to read in class may “trigger” emotional upset"…."The Trigger Warning in the Featured Image was displayed at Oberlin whenChristina Hoff Sommers spoke:"