Satire! "17-year-old teenager sues his parents for being born white."

Did I remember to say "satire"?

World News Daily Report (Satirical Satire)

St-Louis, MO | A 17-year-old is undertaking one of the most controversial lawsuits of the history of the country as he is suing his own biological parents for being born white.

Anthony Dwight, 17, claims he has suffered his whole life from the shame of being born white.“When I was a kid, I’d spend hours in the shower trying to wash off the white off my skin, but it would never go away,” he recalls painfully. 

“Isn’t there enough white people on this planet already? Haven’t we inflicted enough suffering, racism and oppression in this world?” he asked reporters.
. . .

"White guilt

"The young man’s lawyer, Robert Hoffman, claims his client has suffered severe psychological distress, symptoms of depression and suicidal tendencies because of what he called “the burden of white privilege.”

“ 'My client did not choose to live this kind of life. Why would he have to carry the burden of hundreds of years of slavery and racism all because his parents had the selfish desire to bring another white child into this world,” he told the judge.

“ 'Because of the level of psychological distress of my client, we ask that his parents pay for all necessary expenses to change his racial status, including skin coloring treatments,” he added." . . .