Thursday, January 13, 2022

5 Recent Babylon Bee Headlines That Were Surprisingly Believable

"Chris Smitherson has a problem: he's unvaccinated -- which means he's left out of all activities as he doesn't have COVID like his vaccinated friends. Thoughts and prayers."

 

5 Recent Babylon Bee Headlines That Were Surprisingly Believable – PJ Media  "The Babylon Bee is easily the best source of satire on the internet. On a daily basis, I see several Babylon Bee headlines in my social media feeds that make me laugh out loud.

"Yet some of the more brilliant stories from The Bee are ones that don’t so much make you laugh out loud but the ones that seem like they could be straight news articles. Here are five headlines from this year that were surprisingly (or not surprisingly) believable.". . .

CDC Recommends Being Fully Vaccinated And Also Getting COVID For Strongest Immunity

Seriously, even the liberal media is calling out the CDC for its mixed messages and lack of credibility; is this headline so far out of the realm of possibility?

 Experts with the NIH, HHS, WHO, FDA, FBI, CIA, and the Bureau of Indian Affairs all have confirmed the CDC's findings as "infallible and immutable."

MyPillow Holds Annual Jan 6 Blowout Sale

MyPillow CEO Mike Lindell has been one of Trump’s strongest supporters and has used his considerable resources to highlight allegations of voter fraud in the 2020 election. Quite frankly, he should have had a special sale on Jan. 6. 

That's not all! Earn free shipping on your order if, during checkout, you submit proof of your participation in the January 6 fight to save democracy.

9/11 Memorial To Be Replaced With ‘More Important’ Jan 6 Memorial

Admit it, you thought this was real. And why not? Comparing the Capitol riot to 9/11, Pearl Harbor, or the Civil War is the new Democratic Party national pastime. While the rest of the country has moved on, Democrats in Congress have been obsessing over Jan. 6 for over a year now, and if we go another year without some memorial being planned, I’d be shocked.

 The cost of the memorial is not known, but Pelosi assured everyone that "we have to build it to find out how much it costs."

10 Reasons Remote Learning Is So Much Better For Children

Ask any parent and they’ll tell you that remote learning sucks. But teachers and school boards across the country seem to still be afraid of COVID, and so we’re seeing lots of schools take ridiculous measures to “stop the spread” or whatever. But what makes this headline entirely believable is that a quick internet search will turn up links touting the benefits of remote learning.

 8) The perfect transition to homeschooling: Plus, it will usher in traditional family structure as women are forced to abandon the workforce.

CNN Boasts They Haven’t Had An Employee Sex Scandal All Year

This one made me laugh out loud for a moment and then I thought, “Wait, did they really?” One could easily see Brian Stelter bragging on-air about how CNN has purged itself of known perverts before blaming Fox News for something ridiculous. However, CNN still employs Don Lemon, who is facing accusations of sexual assault. So this headline may be obsolete soon.

 “With all of these changes, we fully expect 2022 to be a scandal-free year here at CNN,” Zucker exclaimed before abruptly ending the interview to take an urgent call from the legal department.

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